As I Lay Dying: Meditations Upon Returning

This short book is sub-titled "Meditations Upon Returning". It is written by former Lutheran minister now Catholic convert-priest Richard John Neuhaus. Neuhaus is the editor of the interfaith journal First Things, and a prolific author and commentator.Neuhaus spends the first part of the book musing on life and death, and then writes about his own experience of illness, misdiagnosis, colon cancer, botched surgery, ICU, and almost dying in 1995. He offers some cogent reflections on the experience, based on his own faith and clinging to that faith.On page 112, Neuhaus describes the strange experience/vision he had a few days after leaving ICU. Rather then describing it as a "near death" experience, he says "I am inclined to think of it as a 'near life' experience." "...All of a sudden I was jerked into an utterly lucid state of awareness. ... By the drapery were two 'presences.' I saw them and yet did not see them, and I cannot explain that ... And then the presences - one or both of them, I do not know - spoke. This I heard clearly. Not in an ordinary voice, for I cannot remember anything about the voice. But the message was beyond mistaking: 'Everything is ready now.' That was it. ..."Neuhaus goes on to discuss this event in the context of his whole experience of sickness, near-death and rocovery. He draws no concrete conclusions, beyond affirming that it was a real occurrence and he drew some comfort from it.The book is a quick read - less then 170 pages long, and is a good account of one man's confrontation with mortality and what he learned from it. Neuhaus weaves a great deal of Christian reflection, philosophy, poetry, and literature into his narrative. It is much more then just an analysis of the strange experience recounted above.So, the interesting reflection of a Christian intellectual believer facing his own possible death around the age of 60.

Based on his own experience with a close brush with death due to complications from colon cancer, the author, a Catholic priest, reflects on church doctrine and philosophical issues surrounding the prospect of death, as well as describing his experience of almost dying.The book is deeply-textured with layered thoughts, yet quite readable. As the author points out, we all will face this event, and it is beneficial to contemplate it beforehand, but when the time comes we will probably not care very much due to the physical misery and detachment that comes with trauma and extreme illness. The act of dying involves a "letting go" and loss of self that is expressed in Christ's admonition of "dying to self." Because the Christian is already crucified with Christ, he/she is already dead and already living eternal life. Yet the separation from the physical body is not without significance, and we may not feel complete joy in Heaven until the day of resurrection when we are reunited with our bodies.During the darkest hours of his physical misery in the hospital, the author sees a bluish-purple curtain in his room and sits up with full alertness, even while knowing that his physical body lays on the bed. For only a few moments, he is aware of two "presences" represented by the curtain, which he senses to be angels. The message "everything is ready now" is communicated to his mind. He senses that he may decide to let go and go with the angels, or remain. He chooses to remain. It is a blessing to us that he did, and that he subsequently wrote this book.I think this would be a good book for anyone who was facing terminal illness or trying to come to grips with grief or the thought of personal mortality.

It's hard for me to believe that Fr. Neuhaus has now succumbed to cancer and is no longer with us. His extraordinary work, writings, and books, including this special and unforgettable chronicle, have been a huge inspiration to me. May he rest forever in the arms of the Lord he served with such wit, brilliance, humility, insight, humor and selflessness all his life. Your life will be immeasurably enriched by reading "As I Lay Dying."

Very personal and touching. I recommend it to anyone in a caregiving role for the practical and faith building merit of this Pastors struggle with the meaning of death and life.

Much of this memoir of nearly dying is actually about healing and recovery, with a near-death / mystical experience rolled in.

I wanted to compare my death experience, as I also lay dying.

as described

It is not a bad book but certainly not what I expected. I was looking for something else so my own fault.